The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys Go On Vacation, July 22, 2025

The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys Go On Vacation
July 22, 2025

Patrick and Timothy have landed at the Sioux Falls, South Dakota airport. It’s a humid and hot July day in Eastern South Dakota.

Patrick: Damn! I forgot how hot and humid it is here in July.

Timothy: Look at it as a free sauna. We’ll sweat off a few pounds.

Patrick: I love fly fishing. Can’t wait to get my fly wet.

Timothy: Nothing really changes does it?

Patrick: Not for us.

Timothy: Our rental Jeep is in Lot 1.

Patrick: As if they have a Lot 2. I’ve seen bigger airports at sea.

The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys head west to Mitchell, SD, and the Cabela’s store to buy their fishing gear. They bring their gear to the counter.

Store Clerk: Where you guys headed?

Patrick: The James River Valley to do some fly fishing.

Timothy: We hear it’s the best fishing in South Dakota.

Store Clerk: It is. That’s why Dick Cheney is fishing it this week.

Patrick: I thought he was dead.

Store Clerk: He doesn’t have a heartbeat, but some mechanical pump keeps him going. The whole river is closed to fishing except for Cheney and his Secret Service agent and fishing guide.

Timothy: I don’t like the sound of that.

Patrick: Is there an Indian reservation nearby?

Timothy: And a store that sells drones and audio equipment?

The store clerk points the boys in the right direction.

Patrick: I’ll drop you off in town at the drone store with the audio equipment. I’ll head to the reservation. Meet you back at the hotel at sunset.

That evening at the hotel, the Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys are busy putting together the two drones with accessories.

Patrick: Tomorrow, we are at the river at dawn.

After a few hours’ sleep, the boys head out in the rental Jeep with their two modified drones.

Timothy: The hotel clerk told me where Cheney is fishing today. He likes to brag about his fishing in the hotel bar.

Patrick: As if Dickie is still getting his fly wet. We’ll be ready for him at dawn.

The boys pull up near the banks of the James River. They can see Cheney, his fishing guide, and Secret Service agent coming down the river in their boat, fly fishing and casting away.

Patrick: Release the drones!

The two drones are sent up into the dawn’s red sky. Patrick and Timothy are on their controllers watching the video screens as the drones approach Cheney.

Patrick: Start the music! Full volume!

Song of the Valkyrie by Wagner starts playing loudly from the speakers on the drones.

Patrick: Light the fuses on the M-80s.

Patrick and Timothy order the fuses lit on the drones.

Patrick: Dive! Dive! Dive!

The two drones hurtle downwards towards Cheney on his boat. The M-80s explode. The explosions of the eighth of a stick of TNT are deafening.

Cheney drops his pole into the river. He covers his ears. The Secret Service agent pulls out his gun and shoots at the drones. He misses. The drones crash into the boat and the final two M-80s explode.

Cheney jumps out of the boat and tries to swim to shore. The Secret Service agent jumps in to save him. The fishing guide rows on down the river with a grin on his face.

…

The next morning is a beautiful, clear blue sky dawn. Patrick and Timothy are on the banks of the James River fly fishing for trout.

Timothy: It’s nice to have the river and trout to ourselves. It’s so peaceful.

Patrick: Yes. Dickie Boy is back in Wyoming where he belongs, and the locals still think the river is closed to fishing.

Timothy: Thank you for a wonderful vacation.

Patrick: No. Thank you!

As the sun rises, so do the trout.

TJM and PK