Seagulls on a Railing, June 25th 2024

Seagulls on a Railing, June 25th, 2024

Years ago, I met a boat mechanic from Southeast Alaska. We were drinking beers in at the J & M Cafe near Pioneer Square in Seattle.

We started talking about mechanics and fishermen and seaplanes, all chasing the King Salmon and Chinook.

The boat mechanic was originally from Ireland. He had a Gaelic name that I can’t remember.

So, being Irish, he told me a story:

I was working on this fishing boat in Homer. The owner told me that he was fed up with the seagulls shiting all over his boat as they sat on the railings.

He wanted me to rig up the wiring to electrify the railing. When the seagulls would perch on the railing, the fisherman would throw a switch and give the birds a shock.

I rigged up a couple of batteries in series to get 24 volts and insulated the railings from the rest of the trawler. I put the switch in the wheelhouse.

The next day, the fisherman comes down to the boat to check out what I’d done. We were in the wheelhouse and sure enough, in come the seagulls to sit on the boat’s railing and make their racket and shitin’ all over the place.

I threw the switch and they all flew away. But they came back. I threw the switch again and this time they all flew away, but one. This seagull lifted up one of his legs and broke the circuit so he didn’t get shocked.

The seagulls all flew back onto the railing. I threw the switch again and this time ALL the seagulls lifted one leg.

The fisherman and I sighed and we agreed that the bird brains had outsmarted us.

TJM