The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys Save Jorge the Burro
September 8th, 2025
It’s another hot afternoon in Los Angeles. The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys are in their booth, drinking Beck’s Beers. The jukebox is playing “Low Rider”.
Eddie at the bar, picks up the phone.
Eddie: Si, Senor
The PBTB can hear the conversation over the speaker phone Eddie is using
“Chicos del esmoquin azul polvoriento, tenéis que salvar al burro.”
Eddie: They say, “Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys, you have to save the donkey.”
Timothy: I’m not sure I like being a “Chicos del esmoquin azul polvoriento.”
Patrick: I heard a bit about this last week. The land that Los Angeles originated on is now called Olvera Street. It’s a Mexican tourist trap near the train station. A burro named “Jorge” is there for tourists to sit on and get their photos taken.
Timothy: Hee Haw . . .
Patrick: How are we going to save Jorge the burro? Mayor Bass wants him gone.
Timothy: Well, I have a friend of a friend in Cuba. He has some videotapes of Karen Bass with a donkey in Taguayabon, Cuba. She had a good ride with the donkey.
Patrick: Have you seen the videotape?
Timothy: Yeah. I had no idea that a burro had such a big burrito.
Patrick: No wonder Bass went to Cuba so many times. That explains why she’s a donkey Democrat.
Timothy: Yeah, love the donkey, vote Democrat.
Patrick: The Mexicans love Jorge the burro. Even the gangs won’t shoot at it.
Timothy: Jorge should be mayor.
Patrick: I have an idea about what to do with that donkey videotape of Bass in Taguayabon.
…
The following Sunday, Patrick and Timothy are dressed up in powder blue business suits. They head for the SOFI Stadium, where the LA Rams are playing the San Francisco 49ers.
Patrick: I know the owner of the Rams. He owes me a favor. We have a pass to the Jumbotron broadcast booth in the basement.
Timothy: I hope our exit plan works.
Patrick: Me too.
The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys make their way to the Jumbotron control booth on sub-level three. The Jumbotron staff is expecting them.
Jimbo: Welcome to the Jumbotron Room. Here, we control all the video going out on the elliptical Jumbotron over the field.
Timothy: Were you hired because your name is “Jimbo”?
Jimbo: I’m a distant cousin of the owner.
Patrick: That makes sense.
Jimbo: You play your video at the two-minute warning before halftime.
Timothy: Roger that.
The boys prepare their video. At the two-minute warning, Patrick hits “Play”.
Al Michaels and Chris Collingsworth are the TV announcers for the game.
Michaels: Whoa! What’s that up there on the Jumbotron?
Collingsworth: It looks like Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass with a donkey.
Michaels: I had no idea that a burro’s burrito was that big.
Collingsworth: The video is in Taguayabon in Cuba. I’ve been there. Great tacos.
Michaels: No wonder Bass went to Cuba so many times.
Collingsworth: What the hell is she trying to do now?
Michaels: The mayor must be a big-mouth bass.
Collingsworth: I had no idea a taco was so elastic.
Outside in the stadium, the players and referees are standing around watching the video. All the fans are applauding. Men are yelling, “Burrow, burro, burrow!” Women are crying and covering the eyes of their children.
The stadium is chaos! Order cannot be resumed. The game is halted.
There is a loud knock on the door of the Jumbotron control office.
Patrick: Time to go.
Timothy and Patrick don SOFI Stadium overalls and grab their tool kits from the backpacks they brought.
Patrick opens the door. Four large policemen enter the room.
Patrick: What the hell is going on? We’re trying to get this Jumbotron video stopped.
Timothy: Yeah. Who sabotaged the Jumbotron feed?
Big Cop One: You don’t know?
Patrick: No idea. The system was hacked.
Timothy: Probably by the Russians.
Jimbo: No doubt it was the Russkies.
Big Cop Two: Can you fix it?
Patrick pulls out the Bass/Donkey video flash drive, palms it, and hits the computer server with a hammer. The system goes back to normal.
Timothy: A hammer fixes it every time.
The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys saunter out of SOFI Stadium and head for the Frolic Room.
…
The next day, Mayor Karen Bass renews the leasing permit for the Jorge the Burro tourist trap on Olvera Street.
Timothy and Patrick are in their booth at the Frolic Room when they watch the good news on the TV over the bar. “Low Rider” is still playing on the jukebox.
Patrick: Maybe we should go down to Olvera Street and get our photos taken on Jorge the Burro.
Timothy: I don’t look good in a sombrero.
Patrick: True. You’d need a bigger head.
A mariachi band enters the Frolic Room playing as loudly as possible.
Mariachi Bandleader: You boys have saved Jorge! The burritos at Tito’s Tacos are free for you!
Patrick: More like ‘diarrhitos”.
…
Mayor Bass’ office.
Mayor Bass: Find me those two powder blue clowns who put the donkey video up at SOFI last Sunday! That video was from my private collection. I want their heads on a plate!
Fin
PK and TJM
Timmy Tae's Thoughts 