Il Papa & The City of Angels, July 11th, 2025
It is a hot afternoon in Los Angeles. The Powder Blue Tuxedo Boys are in their booth at the Frolic Room, drinking Beck’s Beers. Timothy’s phone rings.
Timothy: Hello, Holy Father…sorry, Your Excellency…okay then, Your Holiness. What do you want?
Timothy listens for a few minutes and hangs up.
Patrick: So?
Timothy: Il Papa told me that he wants to save the City of Angels. He wants us to hire 10,000 workers and buy a thousand dump trucks plus excavators, bulldozers, and barges, to clean up Los Angeles.
Patrick: So that’s what Leo is doing with his Cubs winnings. The Pope has been betting on his hometown Chicago Cubs all summer and made millions.
Timothy: Yeah, he is a big baseball fan.
Eddie walks over: So, you need 10,000 workers and heavy equipment. No problem.
Patrick: Don’t forget the barges.
Eddie: My cousin Enrique is from Honduras, and he runs Boyle Heights. He can get you the manpower and equipment tomorrow.
Timothy: The Pope also wanted the trucks, barges, and the other stuff all painted in powder blue with his flag on the side.
Patrick: The Honduran flag is blue. We’ll add that on. That way, no one can stop the trucks, barges, and whatever. Los Angeles is a sanctuary city. No politician will dare shut us down.
Timothy: These are poor Honduran refugees trying to feed their families while helping out the city of Los Angeles.
Patrick: They clear all the burnt-out lots in LA. Take the crap to the piers in Malibu, load it on barges, and take out to sea beyond the 12-mile territorial limit.
Timothy: The Coast Guard won’t want to appear racist. They’ll let the barges pass. Oh, and one more thing, all the barges have to go to this specific location to dump their loads.
Patrick: We’ll call it “The Papal Dump”.
Timothy: I would hope Leo has at least one a day.
The phone calls are made. The money is transferred. Soon enough, Los Angeles is cleared of all fire debris.
Meanwhile, twelve miles out at sea at The Papal Dump, an island slowly emerges from the ocean. An island of concrete, rebar, and soil appears. It grows and grows in size.
Pope Leo arrives at LAX in the Papal Plane. He is wearing his full Papal Regalia. The pope gets out of his jet and climbs into his Papal Chopper and flies out to the new island at the Papal Dump.
Pope Leo: I declare this new land for Vatican City.
Pope Leo plants his Papal Flag amidst the concrete, rebar, and other debris.
A year later, the island, called Isle de Leo, is a Papal Retreat. It becomes Pope Leo’s summer home.
…
Patrick: Leo’s wire transfer came in today. We made out okay.
Timothy: So did the Hondurans. They are taking over Pasadena.
Eddie: I’m moving into the old Playboy Mansion, but so are all my relatives. They eat all my food. Drink my booze. And pee in the pool.
Timothy: What do you think Leo is doing out there on his island?
TJM & PK
Timmy Tae's Thoughts 